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| DAVID HOUSTON - Lead Guitar - Age 16 - Influences - Smashing Pumpkins, The Cure, Bauhaus, Joe Satrianni, John Ford. - Cock Length- Refuses to Comment (Dave refuses, not his cock) - Notable Aspects - One of the best guitarists in the state of Utah, winner of the award for Getting Along with the Smallest Number of People Anywhere, has been striking terror in the hearts of sheep sodomizers since 1996. IAN SHORR - Bass, Vocals - Age - 17 - Influences - The Beatles, Paul Simon, The Clash, KMFDM, Smashing Pumpkins. - Cock Length - N/A (has a vagina) - Notable Aspects- Brain rotted from too much Ritalin and sex with produce (its all about those cantelopes), sleeps with anything with a pulse, is attempting to start the Nudity Mafia at his school (go on peeing rampages). Jonathan Myers - Drums - Age - 15 - Influences - Garbage, Alice in Chains, house music, Smashing Pumpkins, Satrianni, and D.J. Fuckstick from Limp Bizkit. - Cock Length- I tripped over it this morning - Notable Aspects- Only band member with a job (we sometimes try to pimp Ian on State Street), is the Nipple Pinching Champion of the world, should get more action than Ian but chicks here prefer fat bastards. |
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