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| I thought I would write you a letter though it's one you'll never see. It's so strange how life has changes and nothings like it used to be. Sometimes I sit and think remembering my past. wondering what we have in life when nothing seems to last. Even our lives must end someday. Oh the cancer has made you so thin. When I hold you tight I feel your bones and it makes my heart cave in. I hope and pray with all my might but things is'nt getting any better. I wanted to make you smile not cry so I'm writing the invisable letter. Those dark circles that swallow your pale blue eyes it seems are there to stay. Oh GOD I wish I could take my hand and wipe the darkness away. The catheter bag and radiation was'nt enough the docter said. Your having those horrable headaches now they think the cancers spread. Sometimes I feel I cant go on just cant take it any longer. then a little voice inside my heart says sorrow makes us stronger. I thought I had friends to lean on to help me make it through. Someone who would understand and keep me strong for you. So many friends I thought I had instead they disappear. I sit in the dark wishing it was me who was'nt here. It's ok though dad I dont need friends. I know I've still got you! I hope you know no matter what you've always got me too! Deep down I know God has his plans it's nothing we can change. I know it may sound crazy or just a little strange. But I'll try not to think about tomorrow or the day we have to part. Just listen to that little voice who whispers in my heart. I LOVE YOU DAD. Cindy Snyder |
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